BASEBALL IS BACK?
Well, with baseball’s return that can only mean one thing…inconsistent and biased opinion pieces by some guy sitting at his dining room table! TOB always wondered what people who don’t watch sports do with their free time, and well, the last four months have been a window into that world. The answer seems to be a combination of board games and “The Office” re-runs…oh, and a lot of whiskey. With sports back in full swing (save for MLB), the distraction from all of the COVID talk and politics can finally take a backseat. J/k, talking about sports is now the new way to sneaky see where someone lands politically! A couple of examples TOB has heard in the streets (with his mask on).
EXAMPLE 1
Person A: I’m so glad to have sports back on, I’ve missed baseball on a Sunday afternoon
Person B: Actually, it’s terribly irresponsible for them to be playing and such a waste of resources
Person A: Cool, I’m going to go talk to anyone else
EXAMPLE 2
Person C: Hopefully these bubble work for the NBA and NHL, I’d hate for a whole team or league to get infected.
Person D: Actually, these are all peak athletes and the disease only affects the weak and old. They have nothing to worry about.
Person C: Cool, I’m going to go talk to anyone else
Pretension on sports, it’s not just for analytics anymore!
Now for the commercial that TOB is currently enjoying:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74SxUZ4D9S8
Great song, sweet house, questionable wardrobe, and TOB’s go to beer on the golf course. Check, check, check, check!
General Observations:
This article may be the only one TOB writes about baseball this year for obvious reasons (TOB is generally lazy and has spent way too much time on the golf course this summer). The frustration over just getting guys on the field almost led TOB to protest the entire shortened season (which as it turns out may have only been a two week protest). Baseball players and owners continue to have the most animosity between each other, mostly due to the strength of the players union. It doesn’t help that the commissioner of baseball doesn’t seem to particularly like baseball. Oh, and the owners would rather not play since it’s really hard to make money in sports these days (paraphrased from the Cardinals owner Bill DeWitt, you know, the team who built a stadium and a money printing factory around it on the city’s dime).
It would have been difficult to have so many players, coaches, trainers, etc. in a bubble, but that seems to be the only way to have consistent sports this year. Also, sneaky good turn around for the word “bubble”. As a kid, bubbles were great. Watch dogs chase them around, someone would buy the big hoop bubbles that you could almost fit inside of, people loved it! Then bubble turned into a dirty word; the .com bubble, the housing bubble, the tech bubble, the crypto bubble. Say no to bubbles! Great to have bubbles back in the positive column.
Various TOB observations (very similar to General Observations):
St. Louis Cardinals: Well, that was fun for about two days. TOB foolishly thought the birds looked great against what turns out to be one of the worst teams in MLB (Pirates). Then they looked like a 25 win team against the Twins (who also may be one of the best teams in the league). Now they haven’t played in a week and TOB is taking bets on who snuck out to a strip club and gave the whole team COVID. Early money favorite is Carlos, followed by Tyler O’Neil. Mike Shildt is 500:1. This team has (had?) a familiar feel to the birds of the last few seasons, a bunch of number 2 and 6 hitters in a lineup that will struggle to score 4-5 runs. Get ready to be frustrated!
Aaron Judge: High nasty bombs, that’s what he does. And strikeout. He strikes out 35% of the time, but hell, he hits a homerun about 15% of the time so who really cares.
Mike Trout: Sad to see Trout sitting out, but understandable. Maybe for the best he doesn’t have to be in the middle of this shit show. Stay healthy Mike!
Joe Kelly: MLB made a statement getting rid of Kelly for 8 games. While he is notoriously wild, and the majority of the pitches that nearly hit the Astros were off speed, MLB wants no brawls. It’s really hard to social distance fight, though it could be argued that’s basically what a baseball brawl is.
Cardinals Outfield, Then vs Now:
Remember that time when the Cardinals had an outfield that consisted of Randall Grichuk, Stephen Piscotty, and Tommy Pham? That was deemed unacceptable so the birds have since cycled through Marcel Ozuna, Harrison Bader, Jose Martinez (a TOB favorite), Dexter Fowler, et al. Well, let’s keep a running tally on what may have been since there isn’t any actual baseball to discuss.
Left Field
Tyler O’Neil: 2 XBH / 4 RBI / .894 OPS
Stephen Piscotty: 2 XBH / 1 RBI / .593 OPS
Center Field
Harrison Bader: 1 XBH / 0 RBI / .413 OPS
Tommy Pham: 2 XBH / 7 RBI / .771 OPS
Right Field
Dexter Fowler: 1 XBH / 2 RBI / .732 OPS
Randal Grichuk: 0 XBH / 1 RBI / .855 OPS
Wow, turns out none of those numbers are all that impressive. Yikes, scouting department on line 2…
Various Inconsequential Bets:
There is no fantasy wins pool this year. In retrospect, it would be a perfect year for it given that we are unsure how many games any given team will play. What a wrinkle! Maybe all sports should try this, hell, Miami is currently 2-1, and if they don’t play again their winning percentage of .667 will certainly get them into the playoffs!
That said, TOB does have some coin sprinkled on this season.
STL Cardinals over/under wins: 30.5 – TOB has the under, looking pretty solid since the birds may only play 30 games
Houston Astros HBP over/under: 45 – Currently at 5 through 9 games. TOB has the under, but would be happy to lose this bet.
Best Moment of the Year (to date):
With Mike Trout sitting out the season, Mookie Betts is filling the role as best all around player. Check this out:
https://dodgers.mlblogs.com/video-mookie-betts-earns-mlbs-play-of-the-week-6beadaa249b3
While the throw was incredible, TOB would note that Mookie didn’t round the ball like he should have and took a bit away from his momentum. TOB is available for private lessons, Mookie.
Things that Make TOB Smile:
TOB’s personal rival (Steve Gerring) is a noted Cubs fan, so any time something bad happens to the Cubs, it brings an ear to ear grin to TOB’s face. Just in the first week of the season Craig Kimbrel has proven to be a terrible signing, and Nick Castellanos is tearing it up for the Red Legs. Sure he can’t play defense, but with the NL employing the DH this year (and probably forever), a $16M masher is just what the doctor ordered. Oh the ones that get away hurt the most…
Golf League Update:
Now that TOB has traded baseball spikes for golf spikes, there has been less blood, more temper tantrums. Finishing second last season it seemed all but a foregone conclusion that the team of Tony and Case would walk away with victory this year. However, a few rough weeks in a row have caused TOB to spend way too much money on clubs to try and rectify the situation. Big match tonight to try and crawl back into the top 3.
TOB is looking forward to the hockey “playoffs” or whatever is going on. Just tell me when they’re playing and I’ll watch, I can’t keep track of the round robin, play in, whatever-the-hell is going on currently.
-Tony on Ball
