WORLD SERIES 2021
We’re baaaack! How many times can we use that line? TOB is aware we are in the heart of college football season; but wanted to get one baseball column in before the season officially ends. Maybe this was my protest to the way they handled the COVID season last year? Nah, TOB isn’t the activist type. And is it considered back if you just go on sabbatical for a year with no explanation or real reason why? Sure! Look, what’s done is done, now on to some sarcastic comments and jokes about my wife.
While COVID is still lingering and mask mandates still dominate more headlines than Britney, people are getting out and about more, going to restaurants, bars, and of course, weddings are back. During a recent wedding reception (shouts out to Matt and my cousin Christine) TOB was informed that there would be no R. Kelly played by the DJ. Wait, what? No Space Jam soundtrack, no “Remix to Ignition”?! TOB was confused. So, he gets convicted of crimes we all knew he was committing for about 20 years (shout out Dave Chappelle), but NOW we think he’s a social pariah? All the while, Michael Jackson is played with joy by grown ups and children alike. After surveying no less than 80 people at said wedding, it appears that while R. Kelly is still alive his songs are a stay way. I’m not saying someone should kill R. Kelly, but until he goes, TOB’s karaoke catalog is prettay, prettay, prettay thin.
Note to the readers as we enter November, Thanksgiving is on a Thursday this year. I know it’s a bit odd, but that’s how it falls. Don’t you hate when that happens? I like my Thanksgiving on a weekend so I can just veg out…
Best Commercial Going:
As discussed in years’ past, TOB probably sees more commercials than most humans in 2021 (definitely all humans not holding an active AARP card) due to live sports watching and generally being a dinosaur about cable. This gives me a great opportunity to judge the quality of said commercials. The Sonic Guys were the best thing going for about 14 years. Then Geiko’s becoming your parents (I think it’s Geiko, hmm, maybe not so effective). Now, step aside mom and dad, Little Cesars has taken the lead:
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=little+caesars+giraffe+commercial+
Amazing!
Various Team TOB observations:
St. Louis Cardinals: Aside from the 17 game winning streak (which should not be ignored), this team was pretty boring all season. That being said, TOB and fellow Cardinals critic “my buddy Dragon” have high hopes going into next season. Bro’neil became the lineup extender they needed, Goldy ended up with a nice season after all, and Arenado was about 90% as advertised offensively (defense is the best we’ve had since Rolen). Waino probably should have hung it up after such a magical season at 40 (also, he was great on the post season commentary for White Sox / Astros, he has a career waiting for him if he wants it). The balance of the starting pitching needs to stay healthy for the team as currently constructed to have a chance. Flaherty can be electric, Hudson can be a good #2 (maybe more like an overqualified #3), Mikolas can be an innings eating #4, and then a rotating cast at #5 is just fine. TOB seemed to have an odd relationship with Mike Schildt. I felt his interim tag was lifted way too soon, before he had really proven he could be a full time manager. Then, this firing, also kind of seemed premature and out of nowhere. The team appears to like him, he’s a baseball lifer with a ton of minor league experience and a pretty good track record in the majors (especially given the last two relatively odd seasons). He’ll probably pop up somewhere like Pittsburgh or Oakland.
Los Angeles Dodgers: The outrage over a team with a $350 million dollar payroll that wasn’t able to win its division was pretty pathetic. This is a team full of all stars, MVP’s, and Cy Young winners. Can we stop pretending they were treated unfairly? Does the Braves taking them down in six games finally end the Dodger sadness? The latest thing TOB heard during the NLCS was, “well they don’t have Muncy or Kershaw, what are they supposed to do?” I don’t know, use Mookie Betts, Justin Turner, Cory Seager, Trey Turner, Cody Bellinger, Max Scherzer, Walker Buehler, Urias to win some god damn games?? Is that too much to ask? The playoff system is far from perfect, but TOB still prefers the baseball model to most other sports. Some years (like this one, in the NL only by the way) it seems unfair. Most years, it works out. More on this later.
Tampa Bay Rays: Unreal what they are able to do year over year. In a division with four teams that won 90 games (and one team that TOB’s old Raging Bulls may give some fits) they came out on top. Flamed out against a Red Sox team that was on a roll but still impressive.
Playoffs?:
The last week of the season TOB’s personal rival Steve Gerring (The Gerring Lawfirm, LLC. For most of your minor injury needs) was complaining that it is unfair for the powerhouse Dodgers to have to play the pathetic Cardinals (his least favorite team) in a one game playoff. “They are going to finish 15 games ahead of them, this is absurd!” Imagine that sentence, but a little whinier. TOB did a little research regarding the fairness of MLB playoffs. Going back to the wild card introduction in 1995, here are some interesting tid bits:
· The team with the best record has won six times (out of 25), and two of those times they tied for the best record with another team
· A wild card team has won the World Series six times
· Two times, the team with the worst record to make the playoffs won the World Series (2000 Yankees, 2006 Cardinals)
· The average number of wins by a World Series team is 95.5, the average best record in MLB is 102-60
All that is to say, the Dodgers winning a lot of regular season games guarantees them nothing (this year will be yet another where the World Series winner did not have the most wins, in fact if Atlanta makes it they will have the least amount of wins of any team to make the playoffs).
Prior to the Wild Card, the Dodgers wouldn’t have even made the playoffs. Maybe they should just spend another $100M and shut up.
Best Moment of the Year (to date):
Charlie Morton broke his leg and struck out Jose Altuve looking. Good on you, Charlie. Suck it Jose, how are things without the buzzer and trash can assistance? Screw!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3O1O97epPc
What’s Annoying TOB this Week:
The new Sonic commercials. #sad
Donut Shop Talk:
TOB’s father has a donut shop in south St. Louis city, “St. Louis Hills Donut Shop” at the corner of Hampton and Loughborough. Great donuts, not a lot of sports knowledge by the random customers who like to chat about the Cardinals and Blues. Occasionally TOB will hop in for a cup of coffee and a cheese flip, listening to the ramblings of borderline insane people. This section will chronicle some of those conversations.
Apparently TOB’s father is NOT back in on sports this year, “I don’t have time for that crap anymore.” Unclear what crap he does have time for these days…
Happy Trick or Treating! Go Irish!
-Tony on Ball
