BASEBALL - WEEK...Whatever
I never should have left you! TOB has been slacking and there is little chance of that changing through the summer. NHL and NBA playoffs are finally over, all baseball all the time! Thanks goodness for ESPN games of the week and MLB Network, otherwise TOB would be relegated to just watching one of the worst Cardinal teams in 20 years. More on that in a bit. No sponsor this week…Naturebox, looking at you!
Various Team TOB observations:
St. Louis Cardinals: This team is atrocious, and that might be generous. Greg Amzinger of MLB Network said about the Cardinals of 2017, “They politely lose.” They have no fire. They take early leads, Matheny double switches out the starting pitcher in the 6th inning (with 80 pitches) to rely on the worst bullpen in MLB. Statistically, the Cardinals bullpen is 25th, but a good way to look at it is their opponents OPS of .774 would be second on the team behind Fowler. Brett Cecil has allowed 15 runs in 20 innings, which doesn’t include the 12 inherited runners he has allowed (at a 50% clip). His WHIP is almost 2, and his opponents OPS is .900. Broxton was given his walking papers, unfortunately Cecil is under contract for a few more years, so get ready for some late inning drama! This brief bump over the past week is fools gold. Sell, sell, sell! Lynn, Oh, Rosenthal, are just the start. Unfortunately the Cardinals have a ton of money tied up for the next 3-4 years on players that it turns out are just mediocre (Carpenter, Piscotty, Wong, Leake, Molina, Wainwright, Fowler…wow, that list is depressing). Maybe it’s time to pick an American League team to latch onto…
TOB wrote that a few weeks ago. Not much has changed, but with that said, I’M BACK IN BABY! One game over .500 as the birds go for their fifth straight win, there’s a chance!
LA Dodgers: Finally playing up to the potential TOB saw coming into the year. Kershaw is still top 3 in MLB, Seager and Bellinger are taking over as cornerstones as Gonzalez enters the twilight of his career. Can’t wait for them to lose in the NLCS and disappoint their fans one more time. Someone get Bellinger the complete set of Seinfeld, he needs to stop embarrassing himself.
Aaron Judge: The most exciting hitter in baseball. Though a bit old for a rookie, Judge has a tremendous eye at the plate even though he’s the focus of their line-up. His minor league numbers consistently improved, he may be the real deal (not what he was in the first half, but a solid big leaguer with great power).
Adrian Beltre: Some hardcore baseball people know about Beltre, but in general he’s kind of an under the radar superstar. Could be his playing for several teams, many of which were not all that relevant when he has been there (only 28 playoff games in 20 seasons). First ballot Hall of Famer, no doubt. Also, sweet way to get thrown out of a game:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbSKXQdQPaY
Heyward vs. Fowler Update:
Heyward: .710 OPS through 325 PA. Happy Birthday J-Hey! Missed about 20 games with various injuries and “injuries.” Still having a very down year, but hey, he’s almost 100 points higher than last year. Most Improved Award is on the way!
Fowler: .804 OPS through 342 PA. Similar to Heyward, this has been a bit of an odd season for Fowler between his DL stints (real and imaginary). Power is still there, and he’s been hot since coming off the DL. May be a move to a corner outfield position shortly, though he seems to be acting like a dick about it.
Manfred Mann’s League of The Blind Update:
Silky Johnson’s Player Haters (Cubs, Yankees, Tigers, Angels, Braves, Padres): Wins – 327 / Pace – 472. Yankees are the only team worth a damn on this list. Cubs were hot for a bit, now they suck again, all is right in the world.
Dexter’s Laboratory (Red Sox, Rangers, Cardinals, Royals, Diamondbacks, Reds): Wins – 342 / Pace – 492. Red Sox are hot, Cards and Royals are getting there, D’Backs refuse to fall off.
Synderhard-on for Kershaw (Dodgers, Mets, Blue Jays, Pirates, Rays, White Sox): Wins – 338 / Pace – 489. Hopefully the Dodgers win about 120 games, otherwise I have no chance here. Picks 2-4 are not looking so great at this point.
Blake Street Bombers (Nationals, Giants, Rockies, Orioles, Brewers, Twins): Wins – 347 / Pace – 495. Barely hanging on to this lead. All teams seem to be leveling off. Need those Brewers to keep on pushing while the Twins and Orioles sit around .500.
Cano Corn (Astros, Indians, Mariners, Marlins, Phillies, Athletics): Wins – 334 / Pace – 482. Astros are still the bread winner, Indians are rounding into form. Mariners are hilariously making a push. Silly fish.
Best Moment of the Year (to date):
Austin Jackson of the Indians made a hell of a catch this week. That’s not what this video is, this is what it reminded TOB of:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bc-ZY-AxtRQ
J/K, TOB didn’t even know this catch existed until a rabbit hole on YouTube opened up. That right side of your screen will keep you amused for hours. Not much better than defensive baseball highlights.
What’s Annoying TOB this Week:
All of the Budweiser commercials with the “America” labels on the can/bottle. We know you were bought out years ago, you aren’t fooling anyone! Well, given the state of our country, you are probably fooling most people, complaint redacted.
Best Comment by an Announcer (to date):
Friend of yours, friend of mine, Tim McCarver dropped a doozy recently. Dan McLauglin mentioned that the Cardinals had lost several games when they had been leading by multiple runs. Tim responded with, “That certainly is a point, Dan.” Wow, Tim, that certainly is a…sentence? Not a good point, fair point, unfounded point, idiotic point, just a “point.” Tim McCarver, wordsmith.
Raging Bulls Update:
Been a rough year so far, some winning stretches, followed by some losing stretches. The White Sox have become a solid team that gives the Bulls fits for some reason. May end up a 4 seed in the playoffs this year for the first time in quite some time. Bulls are the only team in the league that can beat anybody or lose to anybody, just depends on the night (or day, if it is in fact a day game).
Game Blouses Update:
Back to back division 2 champions! Suck it Big Balls! Fall session starts up here in a few weeks, time to defend those titles!
Donut Shop Talk:
TOB’s father has a donut shop in south St. Louis city, “St. Louis Hills Donut Shop” at the corner of Hampton and Loughborough. Great donuts, not a lot of sports knowledge by the random customers who like to chat about the Cardinals and Blues. Occasionally TOB will hop in for a cup of coffee and a cheese flip, listening to the ramblings of borderline insane people. This section will chronicle some of those conversations.
St. Louis Hills Donuts was on vacation last week. Nothing special to report, other than TOB’s father’s constant complaints about Mike Matheny being a total idiot.
Look for a feature about why baseball can’t develop stars later this week! Also, TOB takes down BABIP and OPS!
-Tony on Ball
