Fall Saturdays in the south, very few things can compare to the atmosphere of College Football in the SEC. Tonyonball took a trip to Oxford, MS last weekend to see the Georgian Bulldogs take on the Ole Miss Rebels. Let's run through the weekend from start to finish and give some non asked for advice on how to properly enjoy oneself in Oxford!
First of all, unless you have a friend or relative (or consistent hook up) in Oxford, you will probably not have a place to stay. The hotels fill up very early (months in advance), especially for big games, so you will need to get a hotel in nearby Batesville. Thankfully, Tonyonball has a connection, so we had a place to stay near the "Square," which I'm told is a good thing. Arriving late on a Friday night, we wanted to get a good base of food in our bellies, so we headed to a place called the Snack Bar. Despite the name, they provide much more than just snacks; the pork chop is particularly tasty, as well as the lobster mac and cheese. Tonyonball's ladyfriend is a mac and cheese connoisseur, and gives the dish a very high rating (though her favorite is Velveeta Shells and Cheese, so who really knows).
The game kicks off at 11 am on Saturday, so tailgating will need to start early (8 am). Ole Miss fans have been doing this for a long time, so they are prepared with plenty of food cooked the night before ready to be reheated in crock pots at the tailgate. Tonyonball recommends a coffee/Baileys to get your day of drinking kicked off. A little shot of caffeine as well as just the right amount of booze to get your body prepared for the days' events. Beware carrying beer down the street in Oxford, cops will take it away if they see it. They are friendly, and if you even so much as "try" to hide the fact you are carrying beer they will leave you alone (I put mine in a Whole Foods bag - no beer here sir, just some artisan bread and cheese...).
The Grove is where 90% of the crowd tailgates, and it is quite the scene. Plenty of students are already three sheets at 9 am, with their parents and fellow alumni not far behind. Many Georgia fans (referred to as "Brotato Chips" by Ole Miss fans) are dressed in their Saturday finest, a red polo shirt tucked into jean shorts with perfectly feathered hair. If you are a single man, I recommend you re-enroll in college and go to Ole Miss for some sort of degree. Just kidding, but seriously, sun dresses, long legs, and southern accents everywhere (note: Tonyonball is not single, he loves his ladyfriend dearly, and only had to remind himself of this 83 times on Saturday). Curiously, there is a thing called the "Walk of Champions" in the Grove, which is particularly vexing because aside from having the best looking women in the SEC (confirmed by Georgia fans) I'm not exactly sure what Ole Miss has ever won.
A group of us went into the game right as kickoff was happening, thanks to seats from some friends that were located, according to Tonyonball's lady friend, at the "60 yard line." An interesting concept. Things ARE different in the south, is it possible they have their football field marked in the yardage equivalent of military time, there are no offensive or defensive yard markers, it just starts at 0 and goes to 100? How do they determine who goes from 0-100 and who goes from 100-0, a potato sack race? These and other sarcastic questions had Tonyonball receiving the silent treatment through the end of the first quarter...
The game was a wash, Ole Miss treated Georgia the way Ike treated Tina in his prime. The score was 31-0 at halftime and it didn't get any better. Ole Miss mercifully put their third string in the game starting midway through the third quarter which allowed Georgia to score two garbage time touchdowns. A couple of things of note from the game that have nothing to do with football:
- What exactly is the Ole Miss mascot - a black bear? A landshark? A racist old white man? All three were heavily on display during the game.
- The stadium holds heat very well, it was about 85 degrees and not one part of the stadium was under cover, beating sun, all the time. This was worrisome for Tonyonball given that my skin color ranges from "transparent" to "lobster shell red."
- They DO NOT sell beer in the stadium...none...at all...totally dry...no beer...for about 3 hours...while sweating profusely...bring a flask and order a soda.
- The in stadium BBQ sandwich is delicious, very generous portion (oh yeah, the south) with thick cut potato chips.
Following the game, more celebratory tailgating ensued, with Georgia fans being much friendlier than most fans would be given the outcome. They are aware of the rebuilding phase with new coach Kirby Smart; good for them, you can justify anything if you really put your mind to it. Following a few more "hearty" dishes (because, the south), a group of us head to the Square, a bar called Boure, which is not at all French, but apparently all cities in the south outside of Florida and Texas want to be New Orleans. Good bar, more sun dresses, and a very good whiskey selection (the south is getting more and more appealing to Tonyonball). By around 10 pm it is time to head home and get some late night food (well, late night if you consider the amount of hours spent consuming alcohol and high caloric food), and watch the PAC12 games.
Overall, Tonyonball would highly recommend a weekend trip to Oxford, MS for a football game. Great food, beautiful women (again, I am NOT single), and a great appreciation for football. All fans were friendly and helpful (Tonyonball was lost...a lot), and more than generous with their food and drink. Shout out to the Vick family for housing and entertaining, it is much appreciated.
-Tony
